This is one phrase that really grates on me: It’s basically the same thing.
No. No it’s not.
I have seen on parenting Facebook pages about couples having twins, for example, and I see comments below saying things like: “Well, I had an 18 month old and then another so I know how they feel. Its basically the same thing”.
But it’s not though is it?
I’ve never had multiples but I have had a toddler and a baby at the same time and they completely different. Doing different things, different developmental stages and stages of independence. Toddlers are no where near as needy as a new-born so how people can compare a situation like this to a situation like having multiples I will never know.
A different example:
Lady 1 – “So what do you do”?
Lady 2 – “I’m a doctor (or nurse / teacher / therapist / insert other profession)”
Lady 1 – “I’m a mum, so it’s basically the same thing”.
But it’s not though, is it?
Now, I am a mum, stay-at-home mum at that, so I’m not knocking how hard we mothers work or how busy life is. Raising children in the home is such an important role for our families and society but it’s not the same as being a nurse or therapist or doctor. I’m not a nurse just because I look after my kids when they’re ill. I have no knowledge or training in this sector (just some good old google-ing in most instances) so I’m sorry, but it is not the same. Likewise I am not a chef, just because I cook dinner every day. If only it was that simple to get qualified in something!
I have a friend who is a nurse and a mother and this particularly grates on her. I know she thinks that it almost downplays how hard the training is be a nurse and the time and commitment that she took to qualify. It’s not the same.
I love motherhood and being a parent. We do a lot of things and have to do a variety of different things each day, quite often fitting in paid work too. I just feel though, that if there was a profession that required you to work constantly, never get time off, completely exhausted you but gave you so much indescribable joy, then yes, that probably would be the same thing 😉